6.06.2005

so together

every so often, i peruse the blog of a college acquaintance of mine, who, along with her husband, sister, and brother-in-law, are in the final stages of fixing up a wisconsin farm house in which the four (soon to be five) of them will live. over the past year, they have taken it from lowly to lovely, all by their little selves. the house has been renovated, the barn has been fixed, the garden has been planted, the horses have been delivered, a baby has been conceived, the neighbors have been befriended, the family work weekends have taken place, and the housewarming parties have already begun. it’s been so interesting to read about their progress. yet, at the same time, it has been difficult for me.

these are four people who are my age, give or take a couple years, but who have lives so drastically different from my own. they seem so . . . together. they’ve got it figured out. they know who they are, what they want, and how to achieve it. and they’re doing it. in fact, they’ve done it. at least, this is my perception of their lives, as read of in their exuberant, paragraphs-long blog posts.

and here i sit, procrastinating yet again at a job i no longer enjoy, wondering when i’ll ever figure it out for myself. will i ever feel “together”? does anyone ever really figure it all out? i’ve been asking myself these questions for far too many years.

4 comments:

Stuart Shea said...

Amo,

I think I understand where you're coming from. There is something difficult about watching people as they do something that you see as a goal.

But this is also a great piece of learning, isn't it? You've said in your post that 1)you know you no longer enjoy your job, 2)you want to change things, and 3)it's bugging the heck out of you. So at least you're at a point where you're ready to make a change.

When you're committed--truly committed--to change, doors open. Hang in there, sister.

amo said...

thanks for the encouragement, stu. :) the career counselor has already been visited, and great words of wisdom have been offered up. now it's on to research! i'll tell you more in an email sometime.

mar said...

i'd like to hear about it too, amo. lord knows i need direction.

mdog said...

i've felt like posting something on this since it appeared, but there are too many thoughts that i can't get organized...

so i'll just say that i'm willing to bet these four people would laugh out loud if you told them they seem to have everything together and figured out. just a thought.